Bug Blog 09-01-25

A New Start

I ended Up going through with my plans.. Kinda I was a day late that's just i was being a pussy. the the day after certainly gave me a wake up call. I don't remember why but I did get into a bad argument with my manager and it ended with her saying she did not wanna deal with me and she'd start cutting my hours If I kept it up

I have zero respect for managers that use that power to control their employees. and the days after that did not help me at all. even with my year and a half of experience it was a massive struggle. plus with short staffing or lack of experience in other areas like cold prep and hot prep food was hard to keep in stock

I suffered the more I knew and stressed more and more cause of other sections making problems for me AND with a rather un-experienced and temperamental manager

 I did not care enough to continue so I didn't.

I Quit

The day after was gonna be waking up at 4am in order to open. and all my problems with rosa's were compounding so much in my head to the point where I just did not want to come in. So I didn't, I did let my manager know the moment i left my last shift. I really felt the weight drop from me. it felt incredible. I really did not know what I was gonna do next but I did have the savings to keep me up with bills for the next month.

I really did care about everyone there. I really did. with that weight dropping I did feel the grief of leaving everyone with a huge gap in the team. either it be emotionally or through companionship I knew everyone was gonna miss me for something. 

there's was only like 3 people I'm in contact with and more who just never followed up with me after leaving. It was more for the sake of me than anything. I really can't do anything for anyone anymore. I need to care for myself more. 

 I'm an older fucking loser now.

 Yipee My Birthday happened. I did not really do much the day of and normally I really don't. mostly cause I work on those days. I did do something with my family at cheddars

I have adult birthday parties now. so now it's just a reason to go to a restaurant all together. which that's fine by me. I used to hate birthday parties as a kid cause at all really is about you. everyone is all focused on you. it was too much for me as a kid

I got to go see all my nephews which just that was worth it. they are all so cute and we ended up getting a huge chocolate chip sundae thing for them. I got about 150 from my mom which was super super cool 

 Getting older is a main reason I wanted to leave food service cause if you have the choice to leave. fucking do it. I would say more than a quarter of food service workers are doing it cause they have no choice. either it be cause of experience or criminal records.

It seriously does not help you with it being a full time job that does not make a home and car payment affordable. it is an actual waste of time. You could actually make the same amount money or more being a receptionist or something.

Unemployment.

That was pretty fun. I knew I did have the means to pay for my bills but to spend it all would be very very bad. so I did spend alot of it looking for jobs which was not fun. but I spent most of it like It was summer break all over again. just being a degenerate. not in like the gooner way but like a ton more gaming and zero sleeping schedule. 

and gawd damn I felt it. I am not young enough to play around like that with my sleep so I was sickly and tired all the time which was super fun.... I was looking all over for job options. I got call backs from retirement communities pawn shops all of em. but nothing really.

I Finally Got That 9-5

I got a boring computer job... I work in checking in and checking out car rentals in my towns small Airport. I am super thankful for my new manager that understood my struggle as a food service working looking for work outside of food service.

and I reckon she saw how nice i was or something like that. but this new job is a real breeze like seriously, I spent like most of my shift playing games on my game boy. it felt so odd to use down time for personal things like drawing or being on my phone.

I even bought a laptop recently to use at work cause of it. I still have to give it some more time but this seems far more  sustainable than other jobs I have had so I am very very happy to start this job.

Right Right Lets get down to the brass tacks...

Right So with the base pay of 14 dollars an hour. and with weekly pay we are looking at 560 gross and 488 with Taxes. meaning we got about 2,000 a month. This is also excluding commission from work. which could add up to 300-500 You got 20% percent of that for savings 50% for needs and 30% for what else ya would ever want. It's never responsible nor sustainable to spend more than 50 percent of your income on bills and groceries. sure ya might have to live with yer mom a bit but that's the economy for ya right now. essentially economic problems we have not seen since the great depression. 

My Creative Projects

 I had alot of time for creative ventures this month. and actually started networking with a lot of local things like art boutiques and other local artists. and this month I actually made a more "appropriate" site to host my work. I'm eventually gonna get business cards made cause I really do wanna work with more local things.

There really is a pretty open ALT scene here in my smaller town and I really want to do work with them like that. especially organizations here in town. I mean all artists would wish to cash in on their talents at some point soo. I reckon it could be pretty soon

the Initial investment is looking like something in the 400-500 range So being employed is really helping me with that and it should not be long because of that.

Overall

I'm super exited to start the month. I had just ended some of the most exhausting months of my life and I'm starting a brand new high paying low stress job. and I have never been this motivated to create and just enjoy life. I might take a bit of a break for now for the sake of work.

Yipee I can be a nerd about linux again.

And I finally have an "adult" type of job.

YEAHH I'M FINALLY OUT OF FOOD SERVICE. I'll talk about it in my now VERY late monthly blog but other than that it's very boring professional data entry in car rentals and there is a shit ton of down time since it's in an airport in my small ass town.

So it's pretty much limited to business people. and Military. and cause of that I do need a means of doing more productive things than just being on my phone at work. so I had to get another laptop.

cause my last laptop just died on me. and it has had problems for a long time before that. 

And I'm a cheap bastard that cant part from 500-800 dollars for a decent laptop

I went down to the pawn and peeped out some laptops and actually had a nice chat with the computer tech about linux. I had told him what I was planning on doing and pointed me twords the business focused laptops.

I peeped out an old Acer Aspire. it's from 2017 and just like other budget laptops... it majorly struggles with windows 11 so there's no point in dual booting. so I'm just doing what I know which is Ubuntu with XFCE WM. with Wine and Proton on Steam this could do all I would really need. plus this thing has a whole freaking terabyte.......

But it's a disk drive. so that kinda explained why installing Ubuntu took like a solid hour. i just thought it was a cpu or overheating issue. 

the Cpu is for sure not a problem for me. since my fav part of linux is making lower spec tech more capable. this runs my typa games perfectly. my typa games being old PC games. but since I now have a full terabyte to play around with I could finally start thinking about more beefy games. or.... a shit ton more songs on Etterna.

Love Marks.

 I Love him so much!! he's my new OC!!

*click to View* 

 Kissies all over!!!(THiS IS GONNA GET SUPER SLUTTY)  

I've said I love marks from kisses or bites soooo.... I covered Sid in them. Speaking of sid. he's my new OC! He's the sub of his dominant girlfriend. he's got piercings facial hair and all the punk stuff. but turns to a massive bottom for his girlfriend. I don't have any ideas for what she could look like but she will certainly be taller than him.

Cuz I love tall girls duh. and about the drawing GAHHHH HE'S SUCH A PRETTY LITTLE SLUT.

Him and his little leather sleeves and big thick collar. lip marks all over and around his cute quivering... er member.... I love when men are kissed all over and bitten all over. He's for sure getting bound up in the next drawing. and maybe his girlfriend will show up. she will certainly be a mistress. he's such a slut for that red lipstick. and he's a real overstimulated mess when he's all tied up. 

Keep your cute nerd boys on a short leash.

 If you thought me drawing naked girls was self indulgent. Oh you poor summer child.. 

 *Very Naughty on this one* 

Hehehe I love pathetic Nerdy boyssss~~~~

That silky hair and cute pouty lips. and somehow they just have such pretty lashes. I love nerds too cause they stumble all over themselves in the most adorable ways. you can see everything they are thinking. if their heavy breathing and stuttering won't tell it. seeing their face and ears flushed with red would certainly tell you.

 Such a pretty boy. Especially with those glossy begging eyes 

 an overstimulated bottom with glossy teary eyes is so cute to see.  WITH the proper aftercare too... I love seeing the physical effects and marks. His Shirt collar stretch to bite up on his neck. a mix of bruised skin and lipstick. Lips stick that also lingers on his lips. I woulda made his hair more messy but I wanted to make it more soft F Dom. 

 I'm Starting to like drawing my bottoms more masculine..... 

Hehe. WOAH. I actually caught myself making the same joke. but instead of a collar its a tee shirt. It's kinda like veggies once you get older you appreciate it more. cuz starting out I really only drew "Femboys" But now I find leg hair tummy fuzz and facial hair super cute. Idk why. I guess femboys were not boyish enough for me.

GAWD just cute fluffy short hair and big eyebrows and big stupid looking eyes... fuck I'm getting too gay... But uh yeah.... I'm gonna keep this stuff up soo.... expect worse from me. It's gonna get very naughty. I'm sorry :3  c

COMMISSIONS OPEN.

 High Quality Scans Available! 

Prices 

Portrait - 30$

Half Torso - 40$

Full Character - 50$

Multiple characters. +20 per character.

(Backgrounds/ Environments Included)   

 I DO 

NSFW, Furry Anthro, Characters, Conceptual Art, Graphics, Commercial Designs.

 I DO NOT 

lolicon to ANY DEGREE, Gore, Extreme Fetishes, Detailed Mecha and vehicles, Political Art or any dog whistles.  

Payable to Both Cashapp and PayPal

 

 

My Portfolio.  

Changing my Art Syle for GENERAL AUDIENCES.

 One Thing has been pretty persistent in western media. 

 WHY IS THE CONCEPT ART ALWAYS SO BEAUTIFUL. 

So many times I see concept art for movies and shows from huge companies and see the real vision directly from the artist. One very close to my heart being the concept art for at the time. sponge boy. so much personality and color and so lively. not saying spongebobs ending art style is bland in any meaning but to see the roots of the show spread so far it's a real shame to see what it could have been. 

 Its very clear when you see Disney movies 

Given that Disney will never tap back into their traditional animation roots. I don't think any of their movies could reach the standards set by the concept artists. There's a couple designs for Elsa but all of them show her personality far better than her end design. someone isolated and even shunned by her own peers it is shown way better in her earlier designs. I know she's not the "real" villain but goddamn that would be cool to see her like that.

 Why Should I give a shit??? 

Sheesh just another artist mad at the lack of artistic integrity. just as Disney counts another BILLION in profits from frozen merch. Y'know what? why should I be mad? Disney laid out the keys to success right here!. why pick things like detailed and nuanced art direction? genuine emotion? pffftt I think it's time some things change around here.

 I got my work cut out for me 

*Talent Manager Voice* Geez what even is this rendering style? Crosshatching? This aint the 70s and you aren't robby Crumb. Go ahead and clean up your act too. look at those lines! is this still a first draft?

 

She looks a bit too scary too. you might get some demon accusations with those teeth so lets just not with that. Can we lower that skirt too? seeing a bit too much there. that nose... you are still drawing noses on female characters? pfft that's so 2006 of you.

 Alright Let Me Level With You 

Alright Let's start from the first critique. Crosshatching can seem a bit garish especially from an artist like me that does not do realism. so I'll switch to Cell shading which is very welcoming to the cartoon like style. Like my talent manager said Robert crumb is kinda outta style and other comic book like artists.

 

My line work can also be kinda aggressive and sloppy at times. people don't like that. I reckon a brush pen ought to work better for me. this delivers a far cleaner line. also with line variability.

 

My drawing subjects certainly have to change. I often pick rather erotic or offensive subjects. considering my 3 last drawings were. Zach hill of death grips, A parody of a nazi symbol and a woman with uhhhhhh.... out of fashion glasses. I really have to clean up my subjects.

 Eh draw like one of those Leh boobahs? Idk My Daughta
loves them 

 I ended up more in the alt space to be honest. still a super super general style. I took inspiration from the sudden uptick in small trinkets. either sonny angels or of course labubus. With these being so collectable and sort of a dime a dozen people prefer for it to be super experimental.

 

Alt is very main stream now and there's tons of people cashing in right now. and shockingly sanrio is a huge name in the alt scene. so cause of that I made the character a small lil animal creature. Who hates animals?? This is just a super super base model of how a metal kid would dress. so scene kids slamcore kids and metal core auto zone managers love it.

 

At some point at this project I even thought about putting the original drawing through Ai Since I know Ai would make it insanely boring. but having grok dump another barrel of oil directly on a baby polar bear to make a shit tinged bot-washed drawing would just suck.

 

 Does having "basic" taste really make you a boring person?  

I know it seems that I absolutely hate commercial artist and those who entertain and partake in that. and alot of Alt people certainly hate more mainstream acts and things like Sleeptoken and... pretty much anything from hottopic. but like... These things are still supporting artists. I really can't hate when Hottopic hosts products from very creative brands like Guild Of Calamity and Snouleaf.

It does remind me of one of my favorite artists schlong johnson on instagram having some of his professional work being with disney junior shows... and so it loops back around. Should I really hate disney for making such boiler plate garbage.... they really do have to make a return to support these extremely creative and dedicated artists.

I know fellow artists would certainly love to see huge studios support weird and underground artist. or maybe the complete opposite when your fav music act finally catches their big break out and suddenly they are not cool anymore. Just support what you love. I know it's hard when your face to face with a super kitch hottopic tee. Stay Creative. Keep Creating. 

  

  b

Zach Hill - Portrait Study.

My Stupid Middle school self listened to death grips. 

 Now I'm Gay and artistically inept.  

First coming upon death grips was huge as a kid. Listening to guillotine was just extreme to a degree i never understood so well. later listening to the money store and powers that B was just life changing for my art direction. Any of those who have seen or heard the group in any aspect knows they are unlike anything else. even those who fans consider the successors of the death grips style still fall short in some ways. no beef to peggy. 

 

So Brutalist. It's sonic abuse. consider tracks like turned off where the song begins with a sulking ominous guitar droning and riffing. immediately smashing into a gritty distorted bass side chained allowing zach hills buck shot like percussion to sneak in with snare hits and Hi Hat catches. as the song starts with MC Ride rushing the bar "I'm Smoking Cigarettes in the shower when they get wet I just smoke another one". 

 It's Like The anger and Brutality of a Junkie was injected into a HP Desktop Tower 

But the Death Grips fandom is a bunch of fucking losers so lets talk about the real chad. Zach Hill. Percussionist for death grips. Zach's Solo projects and ongoing projects far out weigh both of his band mates. I am biased as a drummer of course I love zach. Especially His Astrological straits album. solo project from him it just shows all of his chops in a far more creative sounding production rather than death grips where production is far more gritty.

 The only thing holding it together is motifs formed by percussive like Composition 

Despite how technically proficient zach is he still steps out of time in order to fill space or deliver drum fills. It's pretty obvious zach does not play to a click and it just changed so much for me in the sense of timing and signature. this all culminates in the end with necromancer. a 30 min track with nothing but drums and piano. both being mashed and played at full energy for those 30 min. it almost seems like performance art. but for how skilled zach is. it almost acends that label into something far more special.