Watercolor Portraits

 I need to get better with watercolor

CWC.  

Quite the character I say. There's alot of things chrischan has done for the internet. either made by the fans or made by them. It's really horrid really. the whole story. Already quite the tough life considering chris' conditions but those conditions being magnified by the internet. It's nothing i wish onto someone. I still think about that. If I'm some sort of persons entertainment just due to how pathetic my life can be at certain points. just that any persons life can be a documentary and entertainment for others who wish to watch suffering. 

Random Goth Girl And Jacob Jones

 I don't really have much to say about the goth girl. but major shout out to jacob jones. I watched him alot while working at allsups. (texas gas station chain) after a whole shift of just silence and lobby music. coming home to watch just jacob talk about ciggs was oddly calming. I'm kinda scared to get back into customer service just cause of what alot of silence and stillness did to me. But then again I need that piece in my life. 

Daniel Johnston but he's sideways

Here's another person I relate to and aspire to be. Daniel Johnston is like the best version of a lolcow. Though his skills were limited the passion in his work is just incredible. And I hope to be seen like that. There are alot of things I'm limited in I just hope people can see my passion though anything. though alot of people won't like it or won't entertain it at all. but I will make regardless. 

 

 

Stuff from the last week

 And a Drawing of a notable misses

Finally. Realistic Lips

Something I've been battling for the long while has been nice pretty lips. They are key to making a character cute and pouty or Powerful and dominant. it's something I've wanted to have control over in my design. and I can make them pretty natural looking too. something that can just blend into a persons facial structure. considering my past I'm really glad I can draw colored lips without it looking comically racist. If you never noticed.... it's cause I never uploaded it. sorry I can't be Robert Crumb today.

Another Face

I had already said about my pinterest getting banned it ultimately changed my art direction. from what i was pulling from was just not clear. so it's been really interesting to see new things my old pinterest would never show me. I hate to say it but I was leaning gooner core at some points and it's really pathetic to admit. That's really what I'm looking to change to not be so dependent on Pin ups and NSFW art work. Not saying I'm gonna be some celibate monk but.. I hope to be a more diverse artist soon. 

Oh Yay Another Pathetic Thing To Admit

I've Drawn this girl I'm talking to.... Twice... It's not like I'm making a mural of her or anything it's just. I hope you can see the drawing and understand me. I felt like such a little poet when I put a heart in her hair curl. gaw I'm so romantic. I really like how much it really does look like her. all of them pretty qualities. I just really hope it's something charming to her rather than obsessive.... cause it kinda is but I don't wanna look like that. hehe.... 

  

Labubu Corpse Paint

 Like Father Like son

As Every GenZ does I have maternal attachment with my plushies

I did it. I gave into the gobildygoo. My Bestie somehow convinced me to go to the mall with her to go buy a labubu. I was not gonna do it cause they were about 30 each at the store we went to. but she did. and she pulled her least fav color. so naturally she looked over at me and said. 

"I guess we could be matching bestie"

 So Now I have one.First off I noticed the plastic of the face was that type of soft plastic babies are made of. which is a really soft plastic that takes paint mediums really well. I still was not gonna risk it so I still sanded the plastic. That's one thing I will always say. If You are gonna paint anything. It's your best bet to use a rather low grit sand paper to add texture to whatever you are painting. But the labubu is still not the perfect canvas since the rest of the body is made of this fluff. fluf that cant really get taped over with painters tape. so my solution was this little plastic bag rain coat. Now its time for the Paint!!!. I knew since the face was so small I needed something really simple. and considering the fact that I have been a raw black metal fiend It's not surprising that I chose Corpse paint.

This is For shure a Lafufu

It's really obvious this is a fake. the face is off kilter. the paint quality was really bad. and There was sprewy plastic on the emblem on the foot. so I can't say I am ruining a genuine pop mart Labubu. I certainly do not treat products as some people do. I find no trends or products like that sacred. It's the reason I got a hydroflask from marshals for 15 dollars. you will not care about this eventually.everyone won't care about this eventually. so let me just have fun and ruin this bootleg.

Ink Time   

I think the spirit of this labubu was trying to tell me something cause my ink leaked onto my hand while i was shaking the jar of ink. thankfully nothing got onto him so no harm no foul. what I needed to do was redraw the mouth and face. which was pretty easy considering the mouth, teeth, and eyes are molded into the face. now it's fun time! I had alot of inspo but I needed something to work well with the labubus weird face structure. and I thought the downward looking "angry eyes" look would fit their awkward build well.

Finished!! 

I Love it!!! I know he's too goofy looking to wear corpse paint well but He's so cute and evil Looking. It actually really reminds me of The aphex twin teddy bears. If I ever get my hands on another one. That's my next idea. Either that or a Juggalo Labubu. I really like this project. I don't really have an opinion on the overall trend. It's a trend of course its overblown and people are making too big a deal of it. I think the Levi Hildebrad could inform you alot more than me. and gives a better conclusion. 

 

I Wanna Shred With U~

 How about we take this to the drainage ditch behind the dollar general....

So My Pintrest Got Banned....

My Pintrest of about three years has been banned. I know it really sucks but it's made me really reconsider my art direction. I certainly have my art style down but working with that to create a consistent Aesthetic and art direction has been really hard. And I've Just decided to actually limit how much I pin on my board.

Skate Fashion and Nu styling

I'm Drawing from one of my fav Generations which is the y2k aesthetics. but specifically things like skate companies alt fashion lines like Juicy couture,world industries and DC. It's just such a fun and expressive style to pull from.

Just Trying Something new

I had explained my main goal. and doing that has been a real struggle for a while now. I really don't know if this will work but this whole limited pin board and everything could help with that. I really wanna aim twords what I have done for my site already. 

Bug Blog 06-03-25

 Change and Solitude 

Solitude Has Become Loneliness

I have been distancing myself from a person I had been seeing for a while now. It was a More Of a very Intimate friendship but it still had an effect on me. I never knew how much i depended on them until I had just told myself not to engage with them. and for the first time in a while I had actually felt Lonely. I Tried dating apps all this month but nothing. It Feels really pathetic to admit my disparity but it's true. and that disparity showed in my mental stability. I Was not really doing good at all.

Big Block This Month

Work and my mental health this month has been pretty tough on How Much I draw. But I still think it's a healthy amount Since I'm comparing myself to my content output for instagram and youtube. One of my fav Projects this month has to be either my Puppy stickers or My Kitty Altoid tin. which is why I say my creative output has not really diminished. I've just tried my best to cope with it since I don't really want to make my relationship with art really toxic. Just that and I know I don't have all of the energy I would want to put twords art.

Music!!! Again!!!

After switching to Linux my Daw of choice had been limited to MilkyTracker. While it was my first ever DAW I used it to make breakcore and not really what I make now. I really left it alone until I Finally installed Wine and Used it to run Renoise. And after using one of the default Piano instruments. I Finally took the bass and drums out of the breakcore I normally make and just make solo piano instumentals. maybe to represent the anger I let go as I age. but that is what Im working with in my music journey at the time. 

Fun With Linux!!!!

I've Made some real big steps with Linux With me finally installing Wine and some other programs with wine that i had been missing out on. another being switching to the XFCE window environment. Which I really like compared to Gnome which is the default on Ubuntu. I know I'm Kinda splitting hairs but XFCE runs better too. I think I really am fully comfortable with linux. I know as someone that just uses basic programs I am not using linux to its full capacity. I'm really doing all i need to do now. especially since I finally got roblox to work. I know. My age is about to start with a 2 and I'm still playing roblox? Yeah :333.         

Overall 

It's been a nice month. I'm Closer to those around me after leaving a relationship and becoming more comfortable with both Music and drawing. It had to get better twords the end of the month. If i had wrote this a week or two earlier I would have sounded worse. But I'm Just recovering.

2 Months On Linux!! :33

Program Accessibility is getting better

I'm Still using Ubuntu But I have switched to The XFCE Desktop environment

Customize ability is what I love the most about linux. But The default desktop environment for ubuntu Gnome really does not do enough for me. Plus I had more experience with XFCE considering my first Linux project was mint on XFCE. After the switch I Started using the windows XP icons and theme. I had some trouble with it at the beginning but the end product was so worth. sadly firefox does not match the windows icons perfectly but I made it green soooo... good enough. 

Wine And Steam Proton

I think the biggest worry for most contemplating windows users is cross compatibility. which was mine too. And which I mean having a dual boot PC is a simple solve but My petty hatred twords microsoft will not allow that so everything linux can provide for windows programs is all I'm working with. Discovering Steam Proton Was huge!!. Of course linux support on linux is really good due to the steam deck but other than that straight from the rip not much games support Steam deck.

But to find out Steam has a Wine based program that automatically runs games just like windows was freaking huge actually. And That actually made me think more about actually using wine. One program I really needed was Music Bee. I use the file sort tool To organize my music library. Alot of my Music File management programs were windows only so. I really Needed Wine actually.

What I Lost

Really sad loss but.... I can't play roblox. Wine Triggers the Roblox anti cheat and just does not work. or has very unstable support due to roblox updates. I still hope someday it will be stable but right now. I have no real ideas on what to do. Another is Davinci resolve. While there is a solution to this. Its really convoluted. some of it dealing with running specific Distros and Installing a shit ton of dependencies. and just hoping my Pc Will not bog out from that. But I'm using Kden Live which from the ground up is a linux video editor.

Overall   

I really can't justify switching back to windows for what I've lost considering the state of windows getting worse and worse everyday. My overhead for Cpu and memory have gotten alot better. especially after switching to XFCE frame drops and loading times have increased massively. I Know the bar is in hell when it comes to windows but it really is nice to not have to see ads within the actual OS and menus. I know they aren't ads but windows forcing or preferring for you to use microsoft products and programs has been my biggest headache with Windows. it is just so refreshing to not see that anymore. so yeah its been great!!     

99% Angel

 We are back to video creation?

Booty! Booty!

I really think the face is my fav part of the drawing so it's pretty rare for me to draw a pose like this. I mean butts are swag but it feels kinda dehumanizing to me in a kinda weird way. I know you could say my pin ups in general are dehumanizing..... but I won't say anythin abt that. I really like how it came out tho. I Made a speedpaint of this. 

I'm Kinda back in video creation 

I've been thinking on it for a long time since blogger has really freed my expression compared to being on youtube so I just think making this into audio content rather than just something that's read. I would imagine the video of this is gonna be viewed two fold compared to the blog page. and it was mainly to bring more traffic to my site of course.....