So Me and Blogger are... Breaking up...

 After This Post. This Blog Will No Longer Be Active.

NeoCities (My New Blog and Gallery) 

BlueSky  

Instagram 

 

Typing this now, It's really hitting me. coming up on 2 very eventful years here. this blog has done alot for me in documenting my very high highs and my extremely low lows.

I don't mean to abandon her (my blog) Like this, but. I just feel like I'm outgrowing her. it just feels like an old version of me. I really wish I could just stick to blogger. But I've just found myself being limited by it alot. 

 

My Goals and scope for what I want my site to be just cannot really be done by blogger. I'm becoming a tad more closed off to where I just really want my site to be more professional. not like you need to read all of my horribly sad BPD episodes or whatever.

So yeah... please visit my neocities page. Of course I'm not posting my backlog but I already have quite a bit of posts made already :3 so thank u for reading here! 

 

Done With Dating.

 I really wish a girl would fix me. but looking for her has made so many more problems that, I don't think it can undo what I am right now. I have been looking for years and had been at my lowest for 3 months putting everything out there, mistreated and ignored. It's how it felt to me, and my self worth reflected that.

 

I'm starting to realize my ADHD is more likely to be mostly autism, and dating made me realize that. being something that's entirely based on social cues. I just did not know what I was doing, I had admitted that at many points but I was still persistent. girls just don't communicate, that's it. I mean given manipulative men that have every right to not be clear  on all of their motives. but then that just leaves me worried about every little thing they say, Knowing I'm one text away from being ghosted. I never knew what I'm doing and never understood why every girl I've talked to ignored me after a while.

 

another thing would be, wanting to date girls my own age. is impossible for me. A girl I know showed me her crush and he was just like me but 10 years older than me. it's what I see all the time. girls my age just don't see me as mature I guess. I just would not be comfortable with dating a girl younger than me. given those girls would only be freshly 18. it just does not sit right with me. I really wanted girls my age, they are so pretty...

 

At the moment, I'm doing alot to improve my looks. It's shallow I know. Doing that before I improve myself mentally. and I do have a deserving fate, in which I know girls will only date me cause of my improved looks. I had been out there for years, just with one thing wrong apparently. just my looks. I had still been a very obedient, nice, patient person. just with one important difference. I didn't look like a f@ggot. or whatever was wrong with me before.

That's all I'll really think about, that my looks did not makeup with my inept personality, that someone will only tolerate me cause I look the right way now.

 

I don't hate women, I never wanted to. I just have issues, I was made wrong. with my recently developed personality issues, narcissism, and self worth issues due to dating. These are issues I have to work on myself. I'd be a burden to any woman, a burden I would not wish on any woman I truly love. I don't know when I'll be ready, I don't think I ever will be ready.   

 

   

There's No Hunt Without Prey

Notice: This is CNC CONSENSUAL NON CONSENT.

So Yes, any references I make, only retain to a scene in which all in a scene are consenting adults.

I really like this dynamic of a brats' bluff being called. top or bottom It's so hawt. either being humbled by the top and getting yourself into a world of hate fuck. or finally getting your hands on a brat that has been pissing you off all night.

she is leaning less twords bratty, getting all doe-eyed once she's in trouble. but I would say playing coy is just as cute, maybe I'll do that for the next piece. the dialog is a highlight here :3. A classic saying, turned around. where yes the prey could just be playing, the hunter has a clear goal.

I plan to have femdom Cnc as well, a personal fav of mine.... srry I habve issues... Also I'm aware this type of work can trigger some, as someone that has been a victim, I'll make sure to disclose and warn my readers. <3