Bug Blog 03-01-25

Changes. in many ways

This last month has had alot of changes even within the last week. alot is changing right now. earlier this month i really had thought more on my identity. And I am working on transition at the moment. while I'm not working very very hard twords it i have my long term things I'm working on.

Right now its alot of watching my weight.

 and to be honest its alot of ED type of stuff. but to be honest i really like it. Being poor sustaining healthy whole foods, greens, and leafy greens is pretty hard. and growing up around and only knowing how to cook rather unhealthy food. watching what you eat makes you look like some insecure teen girl. but I am really. black coffee for appetite suppression, no red meats, snacks are fruits, nuts, and dark chocolate. i've been searching and finding more and more healthier foods. I'm still enjoying the things I like. it's gonna have to be a while to see some changes in my own eyes but my mom says im pretty skinny already. but that's being skinny as a male which of course has different connotations.

Making Video Content Has Changed Alot For Me

I have kinda quit video content at the moment. i did have my moment with it for a moment but right now authentic video content is just hard to get any fruits from at the moment. it's just hard to watch some of the most valueless content thrive. it's not what it used to be anymore. it's alot of work for what is a constantly fluctuating market. I have a whole blog about how much i hate the internet right now so that is really a whole different thing right now.

Work ( And It's Getting Better )

So working for Allsups for the last 3 months has really sucked. like hardcore working overnights has made me the most tired ive ever been in my life. it has really made my mental more unstable. and that joint is just so trashy. I do not know what made me think this was gonna be an easy job but really it was but i just get no respect and it's changed me alot. it made me actually start smoking from how valueless i feel. but actually this changed massively when I actually started the process of coming back to rosas. I know it feels like a step backwards but really i do miss all the people there. I know it hard work but I've never felt more like a team. and they actually hired me back at 13.50 an hour which is freaking hugeeee.

My Finances And Future Plans

as of right now i am giving about 300-400 twords my savings account which will increase when I start at rosas. and that will help me get my HVAC certification. and after that i could actually finally move out. this is gonna be about 6 months minimum i rekon to start or be finished with my certification. and from there i hope to work with Air Dynamics or Billy Black. though i wish i had some art projects i start here. to be honest. money is my real focus this year. though I hope to still draw stuff as normal. i don't know if i would continue with print making like i had said a long time ago.

so that's been the last month for me. though i hope to keep some of my creative output up. after stopping video creation and Instagram posting. I'm really gonna focus on myself.